


Angels on a Sofa

by 222Ravens



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Afterlife, Angels, Banter, Crack, F/M, Gen, M/M, implied Dean Winchester/Castiel, past Dean/Anna Milton
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-18
Updated: 2012-10-18
Packaged: 2017-11-16 13:21:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/539876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/222Ravens/pseuds/222Ravens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever wondered what happens to angels when they die? This is one theory.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Angels on a Sofa

**Author's Note:**

> All the stuff about Purgatory made me wonder. If humans go to heaven or hell when they die, and monsters go to Purgatory.... What happens to the angels? Castiel has to be resurrected from somewhere, doesn't he?
> 
> This is the extremely cracky end result of that thought. I regret nothing.

" _And Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii willllllll aaaallllllwwwwaaayyyyssss_ …"

 

"Shut up." Balthazar glowers, arms crossed, as he sank lower into the shabby sofa. "Seriously, don't make me kill you."

 

Gabriel grins winningly, raising a beer in mock salute from his position, perched on the arm of the sofa. "If I remember correctly, _brother,_ you've already tried that. Thrice. Today. The last time was pretty creative though, so by all means, go ahead. Beats gameshows."

 

Balthazar pursed his lips. "After all we did for reality, and the afterlife for an angel is essentially a crappy basement rec room with 70s avocado wallpaper. Pitiful."

 

"Yeah, well, God's a dick. We've established this fact. Still, could be worse. Imagine how shitty it'd be if I'd actually managed to kill ole' Lucifer. Can you imagine _him_ stuck down here with the rest of us?" Gabriel remarks, shuddering, and crumpling the beer can in his fist. "Oh well. Anyone up for darts?"

 

Anna picks up the clicker, and begins channel changing. "I'm inclined to agree with Balthazar, for once. Being a dead angel sucks. Our heavenly Father couldn't even have given us anything about basic cable? Almost makes me regret trying to kill the Winchesters."

 

"Tell me about it." Uriel speaks up from the corner, where he is concentrating fiercely on the seven thousand, two hundred and forty-ninth game of foosball with Raphael. (Raphael with 4253 wins to Uriel's 3096.)

 

"Didn't you sleep with one of them?" Gabriel asks Anna, winking. "The short one?"

 

Anna grimaces, putting down the clicker after eventually settling on _Dr Sexy, MD_. "I was human at the time. It happens."

 

"The taller one was hotter, but still... Label me impressed. Even dear brother Cas hasn't managed it yet, and their relationship is just _embarrassingly_ laden with sexual tension." Gabriel smirks, and Anna rolls her eyes.

 

There was a faint noise, almost a whooshing, from the corner, but the sound of the foosball table and television muffles it enough that none of the bickering Angels actually notice.

 

"It was rather disgusting, really, his little infatuation." Balthazar comments, before hearing a polite cough from behind him. 

 

They all finally turned towards the source of the noise, to see Castiel standing in the corner, looking faintly sheepish.

 

"Hello. I seem to have died. Again. And I am not infatuated with Dean Winchester, brother. We simply share a profound bond."

 

Gabriel snorts, while Raphael growls, "Castiel… How _lovely_ to see you."

 

"Raph…" There was a blinding flash of light, and the trench-coated angel fades away, mid-word.

 

"Bastard." Balthazar grumbles. "This is getting annoying. What's that, the fifth time?"

 

"Why is he always getting resurrected? I was a much better angel." Whines yet another angel, who was flipping through a June 1987 Reader's Digest.

 

"SHUT UP, ZACHARIAH!" 


End file.
